How it is
by etariel
Summary: SasuSakuNaru. Exploring such things as limitations and bonds. She wishes that it was not this way but this is how it is. Sasuke is opposite of them and they are not together.


First piece of writing in a long time. PYCK is slowly coming along, very, very slowly. This took about three days to write. I've been working on and off since Friday on this. It didn't quite turn out the way I would have liked. I wasn't going for a depressing ending, but... ah well.

Enjoy.

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_It is how it is_; Sakura had once heard someone tell Naruto. They'd spoken in that all knowing voice that adults used when they tried to teach children about life. She could have laughed at this old civilian man as he spoke it. At only seventeen years of age, they knew more of life and death than this man could ever know.

It is how it is. She'd known that Naruto would not believe it, he was one of the precious few for who the rules that shackled most people didn't apply. What was impossible for her was possible for him.

Surprisingly Naruto had simply smiled sadly at the person offering this advice, rather than raising his voice and yelling. He'd grown, she thought sadly at the time. Naruto had softly spoken. "If that was true, I wouldn't be here." The frail old man stared into Naruto's blue eyes for a long moment. Then Naruto left.

Standing here, Sakura can't help but recall it and wonder for a moment if the old man was right. It is how it is. The three of them form a triangle, all gazing inward unsure of what to do or say.

But they are not quite a triangle, cause it is not just the three of them. There are other influences. Somewhere inside of her she can almost hear Tsunade-shishou crying. She is the one who lost her team, who lost her love, who lost her family. For a moment Naruto is not blond and bright, but instead older with white hair someone who has lost his closest friend. Sasuke is not quite himself either, instead he has longer hair, and his eyes are golden, not human but animal. He is someone who has betrayed his team.

But that is not it, because somewhere behind her she can hear Sai shifting nervously, unsure of what to do. It should have been Sasuke, not his replacement. But no, she corrects herself. Sai may have come to replace Sasuke, but he is more than a replacement… he is a friend, he is their teammate. Kakashi-sensei is not physically there, but she can almost hear him whisper. "Teamwork, Teamwork, Teamwork…"

Standing behind Sasuke is Itachi, whose darkness covers Sasuke. _Hate me._ She blinks her eyes and he fades. She turns to see Naruto and is shocked to see a ghost of the Kyuubi behind him. Even though it is only a shade of itself, she can feel its hatred and anger. Its power smothers her.

She lifts one hand up and looks at it, from one-wrist dangles the same ribbon she had received from Ino. Then at the other wrist, from which dangles the cut pink strands of her long hair. It is the symbol of her strength and the mark of her determination.

They are wandering children of shade, broken and bruised but still dream-burned. Naruto will become Hokage, and she will become strong, and Sasuke will avenge his clan. She blinks once more and it is simply the three of them, facing each other. It is just them.

But at the same time it is not. Because they are not like they were as children. They have changed, and Sasuke has changed. She wishes that it was not this way but this is how it is. Sasuke is opposite of them and they are not together.

They've chased after him, like the moon chases the sun always so close but always just out of reach. This time they have crossed paths, and she doesn't plan on letting them separate. "Come home," she pleads.

But he shakes his head. _I can't, I can't._

"I'll drag you back if I have to!" Naruto threatens.

Why can't he just accept that they're all connected, despite everything? She'd reached that conclusion in the beginning. They can't give up on him because they will always be tied together. It is something that can't break.

"Sasuke…" she whispers, and takes the first step towards him, shifting their triangle. Sasuke doesn't respond, but likewise doesn't move away. She keeps moving forward and soon she can reach out a hand and touch him if she thought he would let her.

Naruto watches from a distance, uncertain of whether or not he should interfere. She reaches out a hand to him. "Come back with us." He stares at her as if she were speaking a foreign language.

Naruto has come to stand beside her, and for strength she takes his hand. Her other hand is still stretched towards Sasuke, hanging in mid-air tentatively. Sasuke shakes his head. "Come on, you bastard!" Naruto yells. Sasuke smirks, but does not goad Naruto in return.

It seems an eternity that she stands there, linked with Naruto and waiting for that vital piece to complete them, waiting for Sasuke. Finally he speaks, "You know that I can't go back."

She ignores that, and tries again. "Sasuke… please." She gives up waiting for him to make the first move and her hand grasps his, and for a moment they are linked. The three of them form something that might have been, that should have been. He smiles as if indulging a spoiled child, but shakes his head.

"We miss you," she tells him and feels sick because she knows this will hurt him. Sasuke quits smiling, and tries to pull away from her. She holds on tightly because she can't let go now, not with him so close.

"I know," Sasuke tells them and reaches out to rest a hand on Naruto's shoulder. They stand together for a few more moments; three broken children whose bonds though frayed can't seem to break.

"Aren't we a team? Come back with us! We can do it together," Naruto tries to convince him.

"Maybe one day," Sasuke replies. "After this is over." Sasuke ignores the offer of help.

_Why?_ She wants to ask. Why can't you come back? Why can't we be together? Why, Why, _Why?! _A part of her wants to be weak and say, we'll wait for you, like an obedient child, but she's never been one to give in. She's sick of waiting, waiting, waiting forever.

She starts crying, and for a moment ducks her head to hide her shame. But then lifts it and stares deeply into black eyes. She will not hide these tears, because he deserves to see what he has done.

"She still loves you, bastard," Naruto adds.

_I don't need anyone. I don't need your help!_ This is what he's told them before, and what he'll tell them again. They can't come with him, and he certainly doesn't need their help because he will do it on his own, even if it kills him. But Sakura's desperate grip on his wrist makes him wish that he could stay, makes him wish that it wasn't this way.

Sasuke still can't come home, not till he has killed Itachi. It will be how it will be. She lets go of his wrist, and walks back to Sai, but as they walk away they look behind them. A final glance, one more chance for Sasuke to come with them.

He steps forward, and she smiles and beside her Naruto beams._ It will be how it will be._

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Comments would be love.


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